Yesterday, I had my first full-on "Baby Blues" day since Clark was born. I've had Baby Blues moments, but yesterday was the first entire day that I was just plain sad all day long, and couldn't cheer up, despite my best efforts. You know that feeling?
I'm sure it was because Steve had been out of town for three days and two nights, I had been alone with two kids under two for that long, and I hadn't slept much for either of those two nights because I hate sleeping in bed without my husband there. Add to that the fact that Jack decided to forgo his naps for those three days, he was getting into everything possible (and some things that shouldn't be possible but somehow were), and Clark was still keeping up his poop-through-three-outfits-a-day schedule, and I can now understand why I was a little bit melancholy.
In my defense, I tried to get out of it the best I could--we went on walks, I played in the backyard with Jack (by backyard, I mean the fenced-in area of dirt and weeds we have behind our house), I sang songs and danced with Jack to try to get my blood moving, I prayed and read my scriptures in more depth than I usually do, and I even went to visit a couple of neighbors. I kept repeating my mantra of "it's okay--I'm just tired/hormonal/bored/lonely," to myself to try to explain why I was feeling so incredibly unhappy.
It didn't work--despite everything I could do, I was still just sad. I had a few months like that after we moved to Snowflake, when Jack was brand-new, but this was my first time since Clark's birth to be so blue, and I forgot that, while there are explanations to why I'm having these emotions (mainly hormones), these emotions are still very real. And still very unpleasant.
Luckily, once Steve got home, he worked hard at helping me be happy again....we had a yummy dinner, he gave Jack a bath while I did dishes, and we drove around looking at Christmas lights and listening to Christmas music before coming home and putting Jack to bed, which really helped me feel more peaceful. I'm grateful for such an understanding and patient husband who has the ability to help me get out of slumps I may experience.
I guess yesterday also reminded me of how grateful I am that I'm not usually an unhappy person. I'm usually a positive, happy person who is prone to look on the bright side of things, and I'm lucky that that's a part of my personality. I've struggled with depression and negativism before in my life, and it's not a fun issue to have--and yesterday was like returning to those times in my life, and it served to show me how wonderful my life really is.
So, I guess the point of this blog is...well...okay, who am I kidding? My entries rarely, if ever, have a point. But I've learned once again how the Atonement's power can help us rise above negative feelings and thoughts. I also realized that sometimes Heavenly Father puts people in our lives who are willing to help us when we really can't help ourselves rise above those feelings. Hopefully someday I can be one of those people to help others. But for now, I'm grateful for those around me who are helping me.
I'm sure it was because Steve had been out of town for three days and two nights, I had been alone with two kids under two for that long, and I hadn't slept much for either of those two nights because I hate sleeping in bed without my husband there. Add to that the fact that Jack decided to forgo his naps for those three days, he was getting into everything possible (and some things that shouldn't be possible but somehow were), and Clark was still keeping up his poop-through-three-outfits-a-day schedule, and I can now understand why I was a little bit melancholy.
In my defense, I tried to get out of it the best I could--we went on walks, I played in the backyard with Jack (by backyard, I mean the fenced-in area of dirt and weeds we have behind our house), I sang songs and danced with Jack to try to get my blood moving, I prayed and read my scriptures in more depth than I usually do, and I even went to visit a couple of neighbors. I kept repeating my mantra of "it's okay--I'm just tired/hormonal/bored/lonely," to myself to try to explain why I was feeling so incredibly unhappy.
It didn't work--despite everything I could do, I was still just sad. I had a few months like that after we moved to Snowflake, when Jack was brand-new, but this was my first time since Clark's birth to be so blue, and I forgot that, while there are explanations to why I'm having these emotions (mainly hormones), these emotions are still very real. And still very unpleasant.
Luckily, once Steve got home, he worked hard at helping me be happy again....we had a yummy dinner, he gave Jack a bath while I did dishes, and we drove around looking at Christmas lights and listening to Christmas music before coming home and putting Jack to bed, which really helped me feel more peaceful. I'm grateful for such an understanding and patient husband who has the ability to help me get out of slumps I may experience.
I guess yesterday also reminded me of how grateful I am that I'm not usually an unhappy person. I'm usually a positive, happy person who is prone to look on the bright side of things, and I'm lucky that that's a part of my personality. I've struggled with depression and negativism before in my life, and it's not a fun issue to have--and yesterday was like returning to those times in my life, and it served to show me how wonderful my life really is.
So, I guess the point of this blog is...well...okay, who am I kidding? My entries rarely, if ever, have a point. But I've learned once again how the Atonement's power can help us rise above negative feelings and thoughts. I also realized that sometimes Heavenly Father puts people in our lives who are willing to help us when we really can't help ourselves rise above those feelings. Hopefully someday I can be one of those people to help others. But for now, I'm grateful for those around me who are helping me.
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